Morning of Day 4. October 29, 2009

Good morning. This snow is crazy deep, but so pretty here in Colorado! There is just something about the snow, maybe the silence is what makes it so beautiful.

A little memory God brought to my attention this morning. It may sound silly to most, but I thought Id share just a little more about who Nathan is.

I remembered that I was pregnant last winter, so Nathan would shovel and clean my car off for me. James has a crazy work schedule, so Nathan is constantly looking out for me. He is always willing to help, you never have to ask him. I got my eskimo gear on and went outside to shovel. I went over to their house and began to dig Bethany's car out of their driveway for them. The Neurosurgeon is making his rounds this morning, and she needed to be there with Nate. I think I probably looked like a crazy lady, wearing James' snowmobiling gear (I cant find mine? He is 6'4" and Im a whopping 5'2", get the picture? haha) Nathan's grandma opened the blinds and got a good chuckle out of me~which made do the same. I am sure the neighbors were probably laughing and staring, too! I am positive Nathan would have been making fun of me, very positive, as a matter of fact. I can hear him say, "Kim, what are you wearing? Have you looked at yourself in the mirror?"

You would never think a simple act like someone shoveling for you, would bring you to tears. I don't know, the little things are starting to become huge in my eyes. Like they say, its the little things that matter most. That is beginning to make complete sense to me. We're just missin our buddy .

This mornings update of Nathan:

The swelling and pressure around his brain is up and down, and they are having trouble with his blood pressure. This is not a good thing, so we are praying, again...for a miracle. I am asking Gods hands to be on Nathan's body. I pray that he comes out of his coma, soon. Pain is the first thing a brain injury patient usually responds to. The doctors and nurses keep pinching Nathan's chest/arms as hard as possible, to see if there is any kind of response. Nathan has yet to respond to any of their attempts.

God knows. He is with Nathan. One of the most incredible promises God gives us is that He will never leave or forsake His children. HE IS HOLDING NATHAN. If the very God of our universe created everything, cant we trust him with Nathan's life? We are surrendering our desperate cries for a miracle, for Gods perfect plan to be revealed . It is hard to see Nathan like he is, but I believe one day, Nathan will be restored. no matter the outcome.

As I read this morning, seeking to share something with you all, God gave me this.

"God moves in a mysterious way His wonders to perform; He plants his footsteps in the sea And rides upon the storm." William Cowper

In Matthew 14:29-30

Jesus told Peter to come walk out on the water. I can imagine Peter being like "Are you kidding me? Its pitch black out here, the waves are enormous and YOU WANT ME TO WALK TO YOU? Jesus, YOU'RE NUTS." (that would be my reaction, i'm just sayin)

So Jesus said, "Come, Peter." Peter stepped out, walked to Jesus and was totally fine, until he noticed all the waves around him. The second Peters eyes steered away from Jesus, he began to sink. Peter panicked! I would have, to0. Don't we all? Don't we panic when things are not going our way?I know James and I did, when Bethany called us about Nathan's accident.

I can imagine hearing Jesus telling Peter, "PETER LOOK AT ME. DON'T WORRY ABOUT ALL THE WAVES, OR THIS STORM...WALK TO ME, I AM HERE. HERE IN THE MIDST OF THIS STORM. I AM HERE WITH YOU." That just brings chills all over my body. If Jesus can calm the WATERS OF THE SEA, Let us all trust HIM with Nathan's life. I pray that this "storm" does not drown us. That the waves will not consume us. If we keep our eyes on JESUS, we can walk on water. I trust HIM, through this unexpected tragedy with Nathan's life. I pray you will too. Its hard, especially when we really have no medical answers, at this point. Waiting the most difficult part of Nathan's accident. We do not have ANY control over Nathan's outcome, all we have to do is wait and trust. trust God will receive all the glory, no matter the outcome.

I will update everyone again, after the Neurologist examines Nathan. Until then, pray. pray. pray. pray. pray.

Keep fighting Nate. we love you.